The New Normal: A Pandemic of Grief Within the Soul
A pandemic has entered our lives and forever changed us. It forces us to begin each day at zero, grow a plan out of that zero, and if we can, understand the new normal and grasp how different our needs are right now. Emotions that might have been avoided or ignored are now unavoidable. Facing forward, a mirror, a reflection we can’t run from or hide from, isolation illuminates the complexion of grief encompassing more than the loss of a loved one, it is the loss of who we knew ourselves to be. The lack of control in a culture where so many crave control, the complexity of grief reaction intensifies. We are living in liminal time and space. We are facing a process that is in its infancy. We are in transition as we see it birth and unfold. In every death, there is a birth. In every birth, there is a death. A need to let go of something to allow new growth, to embrace a new normal.
Here are tips and tasks for people who are grieving during the pandemic:
- If you know a friend who was already in grieving, don’t wait for them to reach out to you, reach out to them first. Even a quick, “Hello, I’m thinking about you,” can have more impact than you realize.
- To take it one step further, ask your friend or family member to talk about their feelings, and name them. We know in grief reactions, and there are many, naming what is being felt is half the battle. The first phase is what I call the Emotional Protectors: We all need them. They are the numbness, the hysteria, the denial, the protest, and despair. They are where we first land when coping with grief and loss. And they are the very emotions we go back through each phase of the process. It’s where we get to regroup, rest, and reset.
- Simply make a point to stay in touch. Everyone’s grief timeline is different. And yes, we are cooped up, and yes we are self-involved and scared, but what we know is that acts of kindness can help the people we care about get through this very hard time. And the altruism helps us too! It works both ways.
4. Ask your friend or loved one, if they want to take a virtual walk with you. Or share a meal, even if it’s over Facetime — Zoom etc- this way you can be in their “presence” virtually.
We will get through this together. Making a habit of spending one minute to reach out to someone who you know might already be in a grieving cycle can make a world of a difference. Just a simple text. Together, we will come out of this stronger.
For these tough times I am offering a free chapter from my book, "It's Grief: The Dance of self-Discovery Through Trauma and Loss"
Just send a request to: ItsGriefFreeChapter@gmail.com
In Print:
It’s Grief: The Dance of Self-Discovery Through Trauma and Loss
Thank you:
